Am I really that bad???

The last few days have been a blur...I have been really sick achy, headache, throat hurt, you name it, even my fingertips hurt. So after my sweet older sister insisted I go see a doctor yesterday I would never have known I had strep. I never go to the Doctor, unless I'm pregnant and lets face it I don't need to be going down that path right now, so....back to what I was saying, I don't go to the Doctor. So last night I started a round of antibiotics and my sweet mother came and took my three older kids for the night and all day today and to the pool, I got some much needed rest. I slept when Eben slept, and feel better. I'm not a 100% but I'm getting there.
My point....after my Mom dropped the girls off at home, showered, pajamas on etc...I put them to bed and went about my night watching my "tape" its of shows that I not having cable don't have, so again my sweet Mom tapes them for me and brings them to me. So I was watching my shows...In Plain Sight, and about to watch The Closer (my favorite) when I hear this voice upstairs. "Mom, I cant go to sleep, can you lay with me?" My first thought was NO! I wanted to sit and watch my shows and then go to bed, however, I decided to go upstairs and lay with her...her being Avery my seven year old.
My seven year old. I found myself staring at her. I sometimes think shes older and she doesn't need me, or that I don't need to love on her, or kiss on her, or lay with her, like I do to the others, because to me shes "older" shes "bigger." I forget that this sweet angelic creature is only 7. She isn't even in double digits yet and I'm already considering her "grown up" what am I thinking? I don't let her walk home from school alone, I don't let her go to peoples houses I don't know, I don't let her babysit, drive a car, get a tattoo, get her ears double pierced, vote, wear a two piece bathing suit, swim without me, go across a busy street alone, use the phone without asking and knowing who shes calling, cuss, talk back, sleep with her window open....etc....then why don't I think she needs all those extra hugs and kisses? I was so saddened by this. I hug her and kiss her don't get me wrong...but at the end of the night when all the kids are in bed, I can honestly say, ok I kissed Eben and loved on him (obviously), more than likely I did for Jocelyn as well, Carys same thing at least a few times (not enough), but when it comes to Avery I have to really think hard about it.
Ouch!! It hurt. If it hurts me, how must my little sweet 7 year old feel? Does she think its normal? Does she not care? Either way, I care. I want to do those things, I don't want her to grow up to quickly, I don't want her to ever say I didn't hug her enough, or show her enough attention, love, affection. I know I did when she was younger but I don't think I'm doing enough. That's where things get fuzzy. How much is too much? Perhaps I am doing it a lot, they say we are, are own worst judge. Could this be true? I don't know. All I know is that 90% of the time when I asked my Mom to hold me, hug me, etc...she stopped what she was doing to do it. I have never forgotten that, and she had two more kids than I do now. I always knew I was loved. I want her to always know that too.